Super Bowl Sunday

Kyle on America and its football:

This sport represents the only true prism that captures what this country is truly all about. Only in American football can you find short bursts of action punctuated by long meetings about how to proceed, a testament to the inactivity that has allowed every other country on earth to surpass us in productivity. This game also teaches important lessons about one’s place in society: everybody has one small job, assigned by body weight and intelligence level, and the thinnest and prettiest employee gets paid the most. Everyone has a preassigned number, and if one is caught doing something that is not in that number-holder’s job description, penalties are assessed.